Friday, July 07, 2006

Fuck man

I'm still pissed about England and Germany both being knocked out of the World Cup, although I'm not actually surprised about England. They choke. Just deal with it and move on.

Now France is the sole remaining bastion of goodness. Let's hope the folks on College and St. Clair have NO reason to celebrate come Sunday.
More on the grand old men of international soccer.

Yo, I leave an alleged "high crime" neighbourhood for a theoretical "safer" one, and look what happens.
Actually, my new neighbourhood's pretty sketch, too. But at least you don't need a car as much. And there are trees.

B-More Club is the fuckin' tits. AHH has the scene's sole white boy, Aaron LaCrate talking about Bodymore, Milkcrate and hip-hop's most danceable subgenre of the past decade.

Want to see the next big things in grime? Hyperfrank has 'em YouTubed up. He also has a grime remix of Prangin' Out.
Speaking of The Streets, I interviewed him yesterday. The interview will be in the November edition of Urbanology Magazine, so check that.

Finally, Andrea Bargnani is rocking Vegas summer league.
And while I realize Bo Outlaw is the all-time king of summer league, making this less of an achievement, it also means that the haters who wanted to draft Rudy "Where'd My Work Ethic Go?" Gay should fuck off for a minute.

Thursday, June 29, 2006

Draft, cameras and Jamie Kennedy, rap superstar

Jamie Kennedy is going to release a rap album. Guest spots will include Ice-T (reasonable enough), Kardinal (huh?) and E-40 (what!?)
First Tom Green, now this. If they're giving rap albums to goofy white guys, I'll take one.

DMC of Run DMC and Ernie Panicciolli are starting a clothing line longside Omage.
Two things. First of all, these are two guys who have never really cashed in on hip-hop like they could have. (Yeah, I realize DMC made some good money back in the day, but let's remember his ex-partener in rhyme has his own shoe.)
Secondly, I hope you can score this gear in Canada.

Elephant Staircase has a makeshift digital camera that takes better pictures than the one I paid $200 for a couple years ago.

The Toronto school board is going to close schools and cutting special ed programs. Here's an idea. Why don't we tax private school tuitions and give the money to public schools. Because kids in Malvern, Rexdale and Parkdale deserve better than this.

Yo, as everyone knows, I love grime a lot, but am I the only one thinking that grime's cousin, dubstep, is going to overtake it. In Toronto, it's hard to find a grime night, but there's dubstep nights everywhere. has and interview with Benga. Check it out.

Here's a little more of the big Italian, Andrea Bargnani. Myself, I would have taken him or LaMarcus Aldridge, but at least he seems ready to work.

Toronto's own Denham Brown was drafted in the second round by Seattle. Let's all hope he become's the third Canadian in the NBA, because he's good enough.

Finally, anyone who listened to my boy Aaron "AaBron" Bronsteter and his producer Liam "Leon" Dynes cover the draft on RealGM radio got to enjoy some of the best basketball analysis I've heard in a while. Good job lads.

No, this World Cup totally is the worst I've seen ever. Mad people are agreeing with me.

Wednesday, June 28, 2006

Back like cooked crack

OK, I'm re-starting this bitch for the 3rd time.

I get bored easy, and I'm not that interesting. I don't know if I can write a blog about myself. I used to have a Livejournal, and it just made me realize how dull I is.

Oh, except that I'm not living with my folks any more, not living in Scarborough any more (tearz, yo) and I'm watching Lords of Dogtown, and Nikki Reed is stupid sexy, even if she's like 17.

Oh, America Fererra, also in this movie, also hot, legal issues be damned.

I would vote her rack into political office.

OK, important news.
The Raptors have taken Bargnani first overall. If this surprises you, you obviously weren't paying attention.

Juvenile is touring Army bases
. Some people will call me a rightist asshole for this, but I'm always impressed when artists do USO shows. I wish more of them. I mean, if Henry Rollins can do them, how can it wreck your cred.

Babs (from Da Band) got arrested at a BK nightclub. In other news Fred and Dylan (pronounce it Dial-On) couldn't even get arrested if they tried.

Because Dipset produces more wacky hip-hop news than Kanye, Jigga and The Coup combined, Juelz Santana is working with German rappers in a effort to get Deutchland to revist their censorship laws.

And I admit it. The World Cup is crap this year. This guy is totally right. Italy need fuck off and stop diving. Although I'm English, I've switched my support to Germany in protest of the English side's sloppy play, and because we all need to band together behind a team that will stomp all over Italy and Brazil.

Thursday, January 26, 2006

Personal serious shit/Beefwatch 2006 - A special update

Let me start off on a serious note by saying that today was a really tough day for me. Some very crazy family shit jumped off and I just wanted to get that out there.
My grandfather is very ill, and while I haven't been particularly close with him in recent years, it's still hard.
He was a British Intelligence agent in North Africa and the Middle East during the Second World War. He was shot four times, took shrapnel and lost most of his sight in one eye as a result. He also raised eight kids and helped found the Islamic Studies Department at the U of T. By most accounts, he was also a crazy, cranky bastard until old aged mellowed him.
Although the terminology would probably confuse the shit out of him, I think we can say that in an old English dude sort of way, in his day, Grandad was gangsta.

Now back to our regularly scheduled program.

You know what's coming, and I'm sure my three regular readers have been waiting in intense anticipation.

Cam'ron's press conference was today.

Okay, I will restate that although I am really more of a Jigga fan, I also have gotten hugely into the Dipset over the last year. "More Than Music" was one of my Top Five of '05 and "What the Game's Been Missing" and "Harlem: Diary of a Summer" were both pretty dope, too.
Oh, and before you ask, statistics wizard Jim Jones was not quoted in any of the articles on the press conference. I will be dropping statisticallys in his honour.
All that said, everything out of Cam'ron's mouth is getting progressively dumber by the minute.
Off the top, this whole statistical thing about Cam being fined a hundred Gs every time he disses Def Jam, has anyone from DJ confirmed this? Has anyone even asked? Is that even legal? If Cam's been released from Def Jam, how can they even fine him? They can sue him, but that ain't the same thing. Cam's either lying or been given some bogus advice.
The all the talk about Nas and Beyonce is cheap shotting and everyone knows it. Go ahead and say that shit in a diss track, that's all good, but don't go repeating it in a press conference. That's statistically a bitch move. Actually, so is having a press conference to talk about your diss track, but more on that later.
On to the alleged Chuck Balti-Un-Jigga love triangle. Again, is there anything to back this up? Other than Jay's desire to be Biggie, which could lead a man to bang a Biggie-ex? But in terms of hard evidence, other sources or fuck all else? No? Didn't think so.
Statistically, does anyone else think Cam'ron is just making shit up? Will the next revelation be that Jay-Z is a cross dresser, or that he once made out with a horse? I really keep expecting Cam to say something like "My boy's cousin's baby mother's little brother's best friend was an intern at Roc-A-Fella and Dame Dash told him that ..."

No more statistics for a bit. I promise.

Also, did anyone think his response to the 50 Cent question was odd?
Now, Dipset vs. G-Unit is a beef I'd like to see. Sadly, I think it won't happen for a number of reasons.
1. Unlike Jigga, 50 and company can respond without having to worry about sending 100 old white guys and Viviendi Universal (Def Jam's parent company) into cardiac arrest.
2. Although I think 50 is sort of a middling rapper who's popular because he's mad diesel and got shot a bunch, his crew includes some insane MCs. Young Buck is stupid good, I think Yayo is underrated. His album sucked, but he's still solid, but more importantly, the new additions to the G-Unit roster are Mobb Deep and MoP. We're talking about veteran rappers who would pretty much blast anyone who tried to step up, both lyrically and quite possibly literally.
Cam'ron is all quirky flow and no content, Juelz is good but not great, JR Writer is a sick rapper but is too low down on the Dipset chain of command to really be useful in prolonged lyrical battle.
3. I'm totally convinced G-Unit is hip-hop's rat pack. People who piss them off have bad things happen to them. Ask Irv Gotti, everybody at The Source and The Game. Fat Joe turned out OK, but only because nobody has more street cred than Joey Crack. Just ask Mr. Crack.

In other news from the conference, Cam won't turn informer.
This is beyond stupid. I know we're all supposed to stop snitching, and I know 30 days will boost record sales without cutting in to touring time, unlike Cassidy's 11 to 23.5 months, but come on. You were shot, dipshit. Make up a fake description and get on with your life.
Here, I'll even make one up for you. The shooter was a short, stocky white male with a shaved head, a beard and glasses. There, now you can go about your day without going to jail or having really informed on anyone, and I can live in infamy as the guy who shot Cam'ron.

Thankfully, Jigga is not letting all this pass without comment.
I think Jay-Z is playing this all rather well. He's right in pointing out that timing the track to release at the same time as the "XXL" cover, right as pre-promotion is kicking up for "Killa Season" is more than a little convienient. He's also right to point out that holding a press conference behind a diss track may be taking "corporate thuggin" to whole new, previously unimagined levels. He's also smart to play it off like Cam isn't even worth getting out of bed for.

That said, I really have this gut feeling like he'll make a track in response. In a perfect world, he would do it with Nas having a verse on it.

SOHH has some commentary on Beefzilla from across the Hip-Hop Universe.

In other hip-hop news, Jacki-O is filing for bankruptcy.
This is a real bummer. When I first heard Jacki-O, I sort of wrote her off as a bad mixture of Lil' Kim and Trina, but she really grew on me. She's more like a Southern Foxy, yeah she's slutty, but she can still rhyme. She's not a novelty act. Listen to her verse on Ghostface's "Tooken Back." That's what made a believer out of me. Let's all hope Jacki get's her shit together soon.

Tuesday, January 24, 2006

Stephen Fucking Harper

If this blog had an audience bigger than my friends and friends of my friends (maybe), you all would probably think I'm a one trick pony, writing smart-ass shit about music and bemoaning my whiteness. But I do other shit.

For example, last night I was covering one of Canada's most competitive ridings.
Yeah, I'm fly.

I guess I should also post a link confirming that Stephen "Mr. Roboto" Harper is our new PM.
I'm not happy about this. The Conservative party pretty much stands against everything I stand for, and I'm taking little solace in this minority government thing.
That said, I understand why people voted Tory. Having a party in power for almost 13 years is not a healthy thing in a democracy. It causes the ruling party to be corrupt and complacent, like the Liberals. It also didn't help that the Liberal incumbent was 67 and looked every day of it. After battling for the leadership of his party, conducting a Mao-style purge of party members who were loyal to the previous administration, and then leading a minorty government, he just didn't have it in him. They ran a shitty, sloppy campaign when they should have been hustling their asses off. So again, in theory, I understand why people voted Tory.
In practice, I say, YOU VOTED TORY, CANADA!? Seriously?

On to other stuff.

Cassidy is going to do time.

This is pretty sad. Cassidy did a pretty good job restoring credibility with "Hustla," but no one noticed because he was too incarcerated to promote the record. Man, I'm fucking sick of rappers going to jail. I know the streets is watching and you have to keep your hood cred up and all this shit, but come on. Cassidy had a chance to be one of the best rappers going, but now his shit's on hold for 11.5 to 23 months.
For every Pac, who keeps recording in jail, there's a Shyne who basically has his career go DOA.

Killa Cam will be holding a press conference tommorrow to discuss his upcoming album, his upcoming movie and the situation vis-a-vis Jay-Z. Statistically speaking, I can't wait. I also really statistically hope that Jim Jones gets to speak, statistically.

I was going to write on this, but I got so bogged down with elections and the important matter of beef that my girl Beth beat me to it.
To the guy in the article, I'd like to say that no, it ain't funny and I'm not sure I'm the one who needs help.
Also, we have hipsters in Toronto, and a lot of them live in my girlfriends neighbourhood of Parkdale, so I get to see them all the time, and I can't picture any of them doing something like this. Now admittedly, Parkdale isn't nearly as gentrified as W'Burg. Yeah, Vice's advertising division just set up shop there, but there are still some pretty heavy characters that set up shop outside of ADVice after dusk. It's more like W'Burg in 1996, and I think that might help. These people are so up in their own world that there's no one around to call them on their shit and give them the beating they so richly deserve. And to the girl who said she found real hip-hop clubs "aggressive" or whatever, that's part of the culture. Not violence, but rawness. Fuck off-ness. If you don't like it, fuck of back to your Arcade Fire records.

Also, just so people know I care about sports other than the Raptors (I'm not talking about the Lakers game, 'kay?), I'd just like to say Wigan? I mean, I knew they were having a miracle season, but this is blowing my mind. They beat Arsenal in Carling Cup play? Holy shit. My world is rocked.

Saturday, January 21, 2006


First off, it's my birthday.

One quarter of a century ago, I came into the world. It's been downhill ever since.

More importantly, Killa Cam is trying to explain his beef with Jay-Z.

OK, now that all (three) of you have read that, did any of it make sense? At all? Is it possible that Cam'Ron has spent so much time in a purple haze that he's lost all connection with reality? Yes, likely even.

So, as far as I can tell, the beef breaks down to the fact that Dame Douche told Cam and Jones that Jay-Z was looking to embarass them at the Power 105 concert. Yes, because disgruntled ex-business parteners are up there with ex-spouses and members of the tabloid press for reliable sources of information. And "Oh, good God," they're going to find JJ's Catholic school photo. Look, Jimmy, I know you need to look hard and all, but I think denying that you were ever a child, or went to school, in order to protect your image is going a little far.

Oh, and some thing about Jay getting pissed off that Cam was going to be president of the Roc, which he turned down, so don't worry about it.

For that matter, was the Jim Jones quote even in English.

Let's repeat it:

"When [Jay-Z] became the President, that was our way out [of Def Jam]. We not with it at all, ya dig, and if you wanna go statistically, not even on just the fire part, just statistically, we sold more records than everybody up at Roc-A-Fella every time we came out with an album," Jim Jones said on air. "Why would we be with somebody that sell no records statistically? The Roc is over. It's more like a cubic zirconium. The diamond is crumbled."

"Statistically?" What statistics are you talking about? Batting averages? Interest rates? What, damn you Jimmy, what? The world needs to know.

Thursday, January 19, 2006

No homo?

So, since I blog about hip hop a lot, I should probably talk about this.
Now, rappers beefing is a good thing when they don't shoot each other. "Super Ugly" and "Ether" are two of my favourite songs of the last half-decade, and yes, Jay-Z's preference for sandals in his off-duty time is questionable, as is Killa Cam's love of pink and purple t-shirts big enough to be dresses, and yes, this song is hot, but Cam, WHAT ARE YOU THINKING?

OK, if this is all a stunt for "Killa Season," I'll go with that. You need to keep Dipset on magazines, but still. Jay-Z is retired. He's a fucking label president now for Christ sakes. YOUR label president. This is like LeBron James saying "Jordan couldn't ball with me, no way." Well maybe he could, maybe he couldn't, but the point is he doesn't want to.

Furthermore, what's with the Dame Dash love? If Dame Dash is so great, why didn't you try and get out of you contract and jump ship to Dame Dash Entertainment or whatever the fuck it's called when the Roc self-destructed. Oh, wait, because DASH IS A LOSER AND YOU KNOW IT? Jay has signed The Roots and Lady Sovereign, and retained Kanye West. Dash has signed Sizzla, who hasn't released a good album since "Black Woman and Child." You know what side you should be on.

Thirdly. Jay did not pay to have you shot. He doesn't care enough.

Finally, why are you accusing Jay of being gay? Even if he pays Beyonce to hang out with him, at least it's a chick. You just hang around with Juelz, Jim Jones and JR Writer, wearing pink and purple and fur and loudly proclaiming that you are "NO HOMO." Dude, stop and think. What heterosexual man, other than you and the rest of the 'Set, feels the need to loudly repeat that he does not enjoy sex with other men? Ponder that.

I'm going to listen to "Reasonable Doubt" a few times.

But before I do ...

Not fucking Federline again.

A few things, which is a few more than KFed deserves.

Kevin, Disco D is working with you because he a) wants your money and b) has a highly developed sense of irony. He also worked with Princess Superstar.

People downloaded your single to laugh at you, not 'cause you're dope.

Your boy is not the next Timbaland. Guarantee that shit right now.

If you steal favela funk for your weak-ass album I will beat you to death with a sock full of quarters.